Posts Tagged ‘Ideological constipation’

Rose is a railer just like Captain Ahab on his whaler

August 4, 2008

In every situation Rose is a reliable corporate hailer

Salzman’s name is central in elaborate conspiricies she’ll tailor

Her grip on reality it couldnt be much frailer

It’s if  she was smoking crack like Lawrence Taylor

She hopes all the trehuggers get run down by a tractor trailer

Hurrying to deliver plastic crap to her favorite WAL-MART retailer

Against Local Solutions she is an incessant railer

Bellowing like Captain Ahab from the deck of his whaler

About throwing R. Trent in the can,  just like was like a drunken sailor

And hoping that he gets beat senseless by an irate jailer.

Compared to hers, his trangressions seem much paler

just minute trifles, that would blind an auto detailer

Ideological constipation that’s the affliction that ails her

Reading the latest Eureka Coalition for Jobs mailer

Made Rose so verklempt she needed to use an inhaler

It claims Richard Salzman is just like Vlad the Impaler

Jerry Partain biggest asshole between here and Maine

July 26, 2008

Shameless ass kissing it helped  him attain

A luxurious lifestyle that your tax dollars maintain

His  ungrateful attitude is difficult to explain

cause he spent most of his life on the government gravy train

Claims he’s self made but he’s just being vain

Perhaps it’s a natural  defect in his lizard brain

Or just an angry old fart huffing on the gas main

hatred of  goverment his letters attempt to ingrain

From public largess everyone else should abstain

So into his own pocket the treasury he can happily  drain.

And use it to fly off on vacations to the North of Spain

Or driving his giant motor home 50 mph in the fast lane

But that’s OK because he knows he’s on a higher moral plane

Thats why His life is one long political campaign

about dirty poor people he will constantly complain

“Just a bunch of deadbeat losers” that’s his constant refrain

says they’ll all use their food stamps to buy crack cocaine

And use their welfare checks to take baths in champagne

as some kind a taxpayer watchdog he will feign

but its clear that he’s only interested in personal gain.

all the money isn’t going to him is what makes him pop a vein

and grumpy enough to throw the welfare brats under a freight train.

Lucky for everyone he’s misplaced his cane

To homeless vets he shows such disdain

Couldn’t care less if they sleep out in the rain

But in 2003 he was such a big fan of showing up Hussein

Bowel movements for him they are such a strain

Even though he’s one of the biggest assholes between Humboldt County and the capitol of Maine